We're having a rough dog year. Last night Cosmo was taken to the emergency vet with what I thought was an obstruction, but he ended up having a tumor on his spleen, which was filling his abdomen with blood. The prognosis was dismal, so we made him comfortable for the night, and brought him home to say our goodbyes. This morning he said goodbye to a tearful Quinn, his boy who he chose so long ago by nearly crawling into the pocket of the camo pants that matched him so perfectly. I wish we'd had more time so Quinn could have said better goodbyes. Then, in true Cosmo form, he patiently let the baby bury her head and kiss him even though he probably wasn't very comfortable. He perked up for Cheerios under the high chair, then we went for a nice romp at the neighborhood park before heading to the vet. He went very peacefully, though it did take a little longer than most. I don't think he wanted to go. I felt very at peace after he went, though, and I think his spirit was hanging around for a while. His body gave out and didn't give us the time we deserved with him. He would have been 7 this summer. This isn't at all what I was expecting.
He was meant to be ours from the start... and thank goodness that nut never dropped, so he was! I wish I could find some of the old pictures, especially the ones in the park where Carolyn and Tom met us on Quinn's birthday (a secret up until the last minute when the trunk popped open and out bounced that little Corgi).
The house feels pretty empty. Losing Cosmo is surreal. We should have had another 7 years with him. At what point do you sweep up the fluff, clean the smudge on the wall (where he would lay upside down and rub dirt), or move the kennel? I guess we'll play this one by ear.
10 comments:
I know what everyone's first thought will be after looking through these pictures. He's with Bunny.
I've cried many tears over this today.... gone way too soon. He IS with Bunny now, but that doesn't heal your heart... sleep well sweet Cosmo... you were OH so loved.
I'm so, so sorry Tavia. :(
Crying for you right now. Young or old, they are never here long enough. Makes me wonder why we do it sometimes. Taking an animal into our homes and our hearts, knowing we will outlive them. But then Summer, my heart dog, bounces into my lap and gently cleans away my tears, and then I have my answer. No matter how unbearable the pain of losing them is, the time we dog get with them in irreplaceable. Hugs to you and your family in this time of loss.
I am so, so sorry. Somehow these funny furry beings worm their way into our hearts and leave us way too soon.
Sleep well, sweet Cosmo.
You know I'm suffering with you. I'm so glad I got to see him last month. Of course seeing him and Bunny brought me to tears again. I know I'm very blessed to have met you at a show all those years ago and the dogs have just brought us closer.
- Mandy (not anonymous but can't remember my password today!)
I'm a little slow on posting here, but just wanted to thank you (if I haven't) for sharing Cosmo's mom Phoebe with us. For begetting Wally and Gogo and Cosmo and Sedona and Holmes, and down the line Captain and Hiro and Rip and *especially Kady!*
Thanks, everyone. I've been slow to visit the blog again, but today am feeling a little better. The time has come to clear the fluff (though Cardi fluff seems to continue to float down from who knows where as a little reminder) and scrub the smudgies off the wall, and give lots of love to my very small remaining pack. It's been a rough year.
I'm very thankful for my corgi family! Mandy, the first words you ever spoke to me were "Is that an Inky puppy?" and I thought you were a stalker for a minute because you recited me the entire genealogy of my dog before I knew your name... and the rest is history. I'm so glad you came up to me that day, groomed Phoebe to not look like a farm dog, and brought us into the fold. Amazing all the great friendships these dogs help us forge.
Carolyn, you have and you're welcome. Can't think of a better couple of friends to "co-mom" with :) Thank you for always being there, being a friend, offering guidance, and taking my frantic and sometimes tearful emergency vet calls.
You know that last paragraph goes out to you, too, Mandy!
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